BeautiFLY Your Life – Installment #7

Recently, I had the opportunity to see someone I love experience vulnerability. What I noticed from this was that it seemed uncomfortable for her, and yet for me, it was a beautiful thing to help someone at this deep level of intimacy. Why, then, do we consider being vulnerable a weakness?

For as long as I can remember, “vulnerability” was a dirty word. Most feared in the dating world, certainly a wrong move in the workplace, and way too scary in intimacy, we’ve grown comfortable behind our self-built walls. But how do you have intimacy without vulnerability? I believe that being vulnerable opens us up to receiving, and one cannot exist without the other.


Giving this more thought, I realized that when I see this openness in others it’s heartwarming, almost endearing, and a much deeper connection is made. But if I myself feel this exposed, I’m suddenly uncomfortable and I become unwilling to receive support from others. There is a disconnect that happens when we live from this place of fear.


The more aware I become, the more I recognize different moments in my life where I have chosen to go it alone, not daring to appear weak. But to what gain? The only thing I come away with is a void that carries over into all aspects of my life. Now don’t get me wrong, achieving and accomplishing things on your own can be very rewarding and at times something to be proud of, but I have found that living so disconnected is no longer acceptable for me.


It’s taken me some time to come to the conclusion that being vulnerable and open to receiving isn’t going to kill me. In fact, I’m becoming much more willing to put myself in this position. The more I do it, the better it feels.


And so, ladies, I encourage you to try this: let your guard down. Remove your armor, put down your shields, and wave your white flag. Surrender to experiencing a deeper level of connection to yourself and those around you. Trust me, it’s worthy of the risk.

– Jan Ping


Read this article in the digital issue of Breast Cancer Wellness Magazine on page 22!